I Never Had a Pre-K Graduation

Today was my niece's Pre-K graduation. In one word, it was adorable. 15 or so 5-year-olds all singing loud and proud, except for my niece. Evidently, getting up and speaking in front of people is not something she enjoys doing. She's definitely not alone on that. Today, watching these kids graduate and start their journey on to grade school, it made me think of how I'm graduating college soon. I say soon, it'll be another year and half (hopefully).
It would be one year, except I missed one semester and only took one class the next. I wasn't planning on doing that, but it happened, and now I'll be graduating late. I've come to terms with it. At first I was upset with myself. I thought I needed to graduate in four years in order to be a success, but a part of me is relieved I'm graduating late. I'm terrified for what comes after college.
It's not that I don't know what I want to do. I have a plan for my life, I'm just not sure how I'm going to make it happen. I want to go into publishing, and hopefully write a book one day. When I tell people this, I feel proud, I feel like it's a good ambition. What they don't know when I tell them this, is that I'm a lazy ass who actually never writes a goddamn thing outside of school. I started a book, but I have this problem, which is common amongst artists, where I actually despise everything I write. It's not that I don't like my book idea. I think it has potential, but I have trouble working out important details and then putting those details into captivating words. Am I being captivating right now?
So, after months and months of not writing anything, I'll try to write something, end up hating it, and then go into another hiatus. It's a vicious cycle, indeed. One which will land me in a soul sucking cubicle. Sigh.